The Only Constant in Life is Change

I feel like I should be quoting someone here. Like maybe I've heard this before? Read it somewhere? Did this thought just materialize in my head? That's a nice thought. So what do you do when you're unsure of something? Yup, I googled it. Come to find out it is an age old saying dating back to the time of Heraclitus, a Greek Philosopher (many hundred years before Christ). According to Wikipedia he "established" the doctrine of change being central to the Universe. I vaguely recall learning this in Philosophy 101... but everything I learned in that class was vague- Monday, Wednesday, Friday 8am class.You know it- optimal catch up on sleep class. Still managed to get an A... I actually enjoyed going back to the dorm and doing the readings.

* Side Note* - You ever wanted to edit those Wikipedia posts to say some nonsense? I have... But I dare not- at least I'm not going to admit that I have. 

So let's analyze this quote shall we?

"The only constant in life is change."

The ONLY- without others, alone, solely, exclusively... CONSTANT- something that does not, or cannot change or vary... is CHANGE- a transformation or modification, variation or deviation.

So the first thing of note is that the quote is a contradiction in and of itself. How can something that cannot vary or change be transformed or modified if the very essence of that thing is lack of change. SWINDLE! Or not... Here's the loophole- LIFE, activity. Every second that passes is different from the next. Constant Change. The antonym of life is inertia, inactivity, no power of action.

So now that we know that our life is in a ceaseless, continuous, interminable, non-stop activity of adjustments, advancements, modifications, mutations and transformations then WHY (And here is the dinger) do we as HUMAN BEINGS (The very definers of LIFE) look so much to AVOID the inevitable? Change? Why? Accept it. Embrace it. Change. Is it because we love to rebel against nature? Do we say - Hey Mother Nature, I know you want me to be constantly changing and all that but I rather stand right here and accept my uselessness in my refusal to change and be complacent in my nothingness in hopes that something outside of me will validate me and I will die a happy nobody. Thanks.

I'd hope not? But you know what? The actions of most people in this world say JUST THAT. I'm not happy, but I'm not sad so I'll stay right here and be ok. WRONG. To be honest the thing that stops most people from accepting change is fear. Simple. Fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of failure. Fear of difficulty. But we forget that before something is known it is unknown, before you can succeed you must fail and before anything is easy it is first difficult. And I don't know about you, but that AHA! moment when something goes from one to the other is one of the most fulfilling feelings in the world.

Because of this realization I am officially EMBRACING CHANGE. And doing this is no easy task. It requires commitment. And full commitment. One of my favorite dance instructors and mentors says to me that commitment is 100%, when you commit only 99% it'll be that 1% that'll hold you back from being good to being FIERCE. So I'm committing to that last 1%. I am trying to will be FIERCE, I will be REMEMBERED, I will leave a LEGACY. Even if it's only one person that I affect I will have a PROFOUND effect on that individual. And I'll owe that effect to my commitment to CHANGE.

Fortunately yet unfortunately that commitment comes from nowhere else but inside. Inside the deepest troughs of my mind, into the most abysmal reaches of my bottomless gut, down down where the muscle fibers of my right ventricle meet my left ventricle. Thought, instinct and heart. All things that I must emmerce in my goal of  NOT SETTLING for ok, alright, whatever, and just good enough. I will apply this to everything I do. And I know sometimes I'll be exhausted, and I'll want to just not follow-through- but then I'll find that 1% that will make it worthwhile. That last little pump of adrenaline that puts you over the top, across the finish line... wish me luck. (Not that I'll need it)


-Mel


5 Things I'm Thankful For:

1. Cecelia Marta- My Jazz instructor and mentor who I mentioned. She reminds me that no matter how hard I work there's always room to work harder and find my inner Senorita Cosa (Miss Thang in Spanish) 
2. My Niece Savannah- a constant reminder that there's always a reason to be better, and do better- even if it's just to serve as her example. (Besides- her smile melts my heart)
3. NYC in the Fall- something about all the different color leaves whirling through the air that makes it super special.
4. Thanksgiving- which is everyday for me but specifically the Holiday- my time to get in tune with my inner FAT GIRL... *licks lips* 
5. ColdStone Ice Cream- Frozen heaven in a cup

Headshots :-)

Not much writing in this post-- just excited about my headshots! My first ever... Just wanted to share a few of my faves and ask for your opinions...

 1

 2

 3

 4

 5

6

 7

 8

 9

 10

 11

12

All of these pictures are untouched proofs... I was very happy with the outcome. If you're looking for head shots done I highly recommend this company Dirty Sugar Photography. 

Ta ta for now! 

-Mel

The Best of Both Worlds

Ok so I've neglected the blog. Who starts a blog and then abandons it? I do. Eff it- everyone does eventually. Sorry-- I never said I'd be good at keeping up with this. And to be quite honest I haven't been in the "writing" mood. *Shrug*

BUT! I found something that I wrote more than 5 years ago... about this beautiful city we live in. Thought I'd share...

Best of Both Worlds 

As I stand here on this rooftop looking down on the city street I can’t help but notice that Central Park West creates a border between two distinct worlds; one of the gray concrete reality and the other the green dream of escape. I look down at the divider, the busy street, and blur my vision to create a kaleidoscope of colors - silver, red, green, and blue all in the sea of slate gray, tar black and the ever so present taxi cab yellow. On this side of the boundary the common sights and sounds of the Upper West Side in the summer grab my attention. The familiar tunes of Eddie Santiago ring from a car on 109th street, as women dance in the street, and kids scuttle by with towels and bathing suits in hand running to the pool located in the great green escape. Beyond the division is a picturesque view of the park. The many different shades of green that represent the trees, the grass, and the shrubbery blend together to form a lake of greenery that makes you want to jump in to leave the blistering heat of this bustling city. Escape. In the midst of the green there are pin points of red pansies, yellow lilies, pink tulips and purple forget-me-nots, and forget you I will not oh beautiful Central Park. It’s a wonder how these two worlds live so harmoniously together, a harmony you may only find in this city of all cities, New York City.
    As I make my way off the rooftop, into the building, the stories of the lower middle class families of this tenement building pique my interest. In every Apartment complex in the Upper West Side you find five stereotypical families- the break up to make up fighting white couple, The single black mother working two jobs to make ends meet, the typical Latino family who runs the “bodega” on the corner, the real quiet Asian family that owns either a Chinese restaurant or a fish market down the block, and then there’s every other family who doesn’t quite fit the above mentioned four. As I walk down the stairs I hear a door slam. A man is standing outside in his boxers and a tank top as the door opens, a truckload of clothing and shoes are thrown out and the door slams yet again. The “break up to make up” couple has broken up, again. On the fourth floor “Big Momma” (as everyone on the block refers to her) is rounding the stair case coming home from her second job, eyes weary from a night without any sleep. Her rugrats are on the third floor playing with the Puerto Rican kids. “Tag you’re it!” “Ah MAN!!!” “Close your eyes and count to ten!” “Ok, fine! One, two... Ten! Ready or not here I come!” “Hey! You cheated!” The youngest goes and tells mami. Two minutes later a head full of pink, green and black rollers pokes out of apartment 3D and a woman with a heavy Spanish accent yells to play nice. In the lobby two young Asian girls are waiting for the elevator, books in hand. A short woman with slits for eyes and jet black hair cut shoulder length is quietly scolding them in a foreign language.
    Once outside the dark clouds gather, a summer rain is about to wash the city. I stay in the lobby as the quick 15 minute shower pounds the dirt off the sidewalks. The children are still outside while it is raining. There is nothing better than playing in the rain (although the beating that may directly follow isn’t appealing). Little five year olds jump in and out of puddles and open their mouths to the sky as if the rain drops were really gum drops. Soon the sun breaks through the clouds and a rainbow appears. ROYGBIV smiles down over Central Park, inviting you to cross the dividend between the two worlds and escape.
    You must always be extra cautious crossing a New York City Street. In this city, one in ten drivers actually knows how to drive. The rest ignore traffic signals and violate most traffic regulations. They speed up on yellow, drive faster than the city speed limit, run red lights, do not yield for pedestrians, start driving before the light turns green, and it doesn’t take much to get a New York driver angry.  Be prepared to dodge cars that are driving faster than a speeding bullet, combat feisty yellow taxi cab drivers, narrowly miss your death by a  millisecond and possibly come in contact with other nasty New Yorkers, some (if you get in their way) might just flick you the finger. Being the cautious pedestrian that I am, I jay walk across the street thirty seconds before the light will change to green and daringly weave through traffic, horns blaring , curses thrown at me in English and Spanish and other languages that cannot be named. Once on the other side I look back and smile. I can see the fiery red sun of the summer day beginning to set. I have survived yet another day in the city.
    Night is beginning to fall and I head to the park. The rain and the heat bring out the smell of fresh cut grass and the beautiful smell of flowers in the gardens that dot the park grounds. I love to come and lay by the forget-me-nots, especially after the rain, the droplets on the petals creating little rainbows of their own. It is a thing of beauty this green world across the threshold of black tar and gray concrete, tall buildings and dirty sidewalks. The sky has darkened and the man on the moon is frowning down at me. I stick my tongue out at him. He’s just jealous, wishing he could lie in the grass and admire the beauty of the stars in the sky, the black night sky meeting the dark green head of the trees standing watch at the edge of the field.
    I look to the left and see endless acres of park, nature recreated in the heart of the city; I look to my right and watch as the lights in the tenement building go off one by one. The families of the Upper West are off to sleep, in preparation for tomorrow, another hot summer day. Big Momma is on her way to her night job while her kids sleep soundly and the “bodega" on the corner is closing for the night. A woman’s laugh breaks my trance and I look to the left again. The break up to make up couple is walking in a tender embrace, looks like their making up, again. I head to the A train stop on 110th Street. Back to Brooklyn I go. Good night green world, good night gray world, time for me to go back to my home and sleep.




The End.... Hope you enjoyed it. :-)

So just to give a quick update on my life-- I've hated the world for the past two weeks... and I know why... and it's actually a bunch of things. And I'm not going to share right now but know that if you see me a little withdrawn it's cause I've been in deep reflection lately. Everything on the surface and from the outside seems like it's all falling into place but I feel like I need to do some drastic changes on the inside. Everyone goes through it. My turn... time to commit to change. And change is something that can only occur from the deepest part of you. But that's for another post...


5 Things I'm Thankful for : 

1. My Mom-- she's always reminding me that even at your lowest there's a high
2. Literature-- anything to be lost in besides my own thoughts and not connected to a power outlet
3. The Sunrise-- a reminder that every day is a new day
4. The Future-- something to always look forward to
5. Shoe shopping with my biff Anne-- I'm a woman- this is self explanatory